I don't... think anyone's told me. [He can't put a specific name or a face to the words. They're just... there, sometimes. Reminding him. The closest he can think of is-] Bahamut... when he explained my fate. I know he meant sacrificed as in dying for Eos, but... maybe I took it too hard.
[Is he just- literally sacrificing whatever he's physically and mentally capable of when the situation occurs? He's felt undeniably unbalanced since returning from the Crystal, like he wasn't finished or shouldn't be here, but he's resisted that feeling at every turn as it can't be helped. The world will wait for him, the Crystal has to. He has no power to return, and he doesn't... want to. He's happy here.
But... what if the memories do come when he's too happy, because he's not meant to be and the gods know it.
They'd started off so innocent and innocuous; a sewn button, a baked pie. But then he'd seen Ardyn - Izunia - trapped in the immortal daemon form and hurting the world as he waits for his final release. He'd seen Ignis, risking his life with the ring to save Noct when he should have worried for himself. He remembered the early days of Somnus and Ardyn that had started them all on this dark path. They've getting worse. And he's handling it, he's fine, it's annoying, just...
His fingers tighten around hers.]
Maybe it's them. Or maybe it's just... me.
[Maybe he's just trying to point fingers at anything besides the grave he dug for himself, because if it's the Crystal or the gods then it can't be fixed, but if it's him then he has to take responsibility.]
no subject
How long.]
I don't... think anyone's told me. [He can't put a specific name or a face to the words. They're just... there, sometimes. Reminding him. The closest he can think of is-] Bahamut... when he explained my fate. I know he meant sacrificed as in dying for Eos, but... maybe I took it too hard.
[Is he just- literally sacrificing whatever he's physically and mentally capable of when the situation occurs? He's felt undeniably unbalanced since returning from the Crystal, like he wasn't finished or shouldn't be here, but he's resisted that feeling at every turn as it can't be helped. The world will wait for him, the Crystal has to. He has no power to return, and he doesn't... want to. He's happy here.
But... what if the memories do come when he's too happy, because he's not meant to be and the gods know it.
They'd started off so innocent and innocuous; a sewn button, a baked pie. But then he'd seen Ardyn - Izunia - trapped in the immortal daemon form and hurting the world as he waits for his final release. He'd seen Ignis, risking his life with the ring to save Noct when he should have worried for himself. He remembered the early days of Somnus and Ardyn that had started them all on this dark path. They've getting worse. And he's handling it, he's fine, it's annoying, just...
His fingers tighten around hers.]
Maybe it's them. Or maybe it's just... me.
[Maybe he's just trying to point fingers at anything besides the grave he dug for himself, because if it's the Crystal or the gods then it can't be fixed, but if it's him then he has to take responsibility.]