[Noctis allows himself to be repositioned, slumping back against her; his hand lifts to hold her forearm where it's wrapped around him, his thumb brushing idly up and down over her skin. It's strange how reassuring it is to hear what he knows already, what she's said countless times before. He doesn't need the reminder, but... he does like it. She's right, he really doesn't say it enough.
He can't even argue with the rest of it.]
I don't think it's ever really been about what I deserve.
[He was able to come to the conclusion, months ago and through a lot of struggling - and, blessedly, with her help yet again - that he's allowed to want to live, despite all expectations to the contrary. That he... deserves the life he's able to live in the time he has. He's not sure why that's not enough to quell the doubts he's been carrying, but they're two different trains of thought- living does not mean getting everything he wants out of life. It doesn't mean giving up everything, either. The balance is what's difficult.
Something's itching at the corner of his consciousness, like a gentle digging of claws on his soul. Familiar. His brows furrow, thinking for a long moment, and then murmurs,]
no subject
He can't even argue with the rest of it.]
I don't think it's ever really been about what I deserve.
[He was able to come to the conclusion, months ago and through a lot of struggling - and, blessedly, with her help yet again - that he's allowed to want to live, despite all expectations to the contrary. That he... deserves the life he's able to live in the time he has. He's not sure why that's not enough to quell the doubts he's been carrying, but they're two different trains of thought- living does not mean getting everything he wants out of life. It doesn't mean giving up everything, either. The balance is what's difficult.
Something's itching at the corner of his consciousness, like a gentle digging of claws on his soul. Familiar. His brows furrow, thinking for a long moment, and then murmurs,]
Will... you let Carbuncle in?