carbungle | IC Contact

IC Contact | Hugtopia

no argument here. i kind of love and hate that this is a thing for both of us, that's shitty of me but like.....yeah

unfortunate honesty i guess

i'll think about talking to ardbert. there are some ppl i haven't told yet and don't rly want to, it would feel weird admitting it to someone outside of that. idk maybe i can skirt around it or something

idk what it is about ppl directing their grief in the wrong direction. its not ur fault a war was going on, and war is a waste for everyone whether it ends or not. but ending it wastes less, so... grief or not that's stupid

there was a guy kinda like that in my world. nifs killed his mother, but instead of blaming them he blamed my dad for not saving her. he hated our family and tried 2 kill me, but then he turned around and tried to give me back my dad's sword at the last second... i never understood him. and the glaives turned on my dad when insomnia fell bc they felt he abandoned their homes by agreeing to the nif treaty. but niflheim's the one who took those homes from them

i don't get it. im not gonna say dad never did anything wrong, bc we could have done more for them. but why hate the one who's trying to help them instead of the evil robot army?

i felt like that after leaving insomnia. most ppl didn't know who i was, just some kid learning how 2 hunt in the wild. unless they saw me use magic i was a nobody. no bowing or fussing or "your highness" or whatever. i could finally be noctis and it felt great

that sounds rly awful. im sorry that happened. you carry some leftover light the way ive got leftover dark... maybe we should cancel each other out lol

j/k j/k as if life's that simple ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

There is camaraderie in it. The sense of no longer being alone. Even when others try to understand, they never truly will. It isn't shitty of you, Noct — it's human. It's why Ardbert and I bonded so strongly, even before we knew what we were.

If you'd like to skirt around using a technicality you have, technically, already spoken to Ardbert. Eons ago he and I were once the same person, and now we are one again. Except that he's from the moment just prior to our Rejoining.

It isn't my place to share the details of his story, so I can only advise you talk to him when you feel that you can. I believe it would help.

I think... To resent your father and act upon that resentment was easier. Safer. Knowing the kind of man your father is, acting out toward him was likely less frightening than acting out toward Nifleheim.

That doesn't make it any less wrong, but it's simply how things are. I'm friends with the Sultana of Ul'dah, and she sought my help in finding ways to assist the Ala Mhigan refugees without causing her own people to revolt.

I wish it could be simple. I wish there was not some limit on how much you can aid another. It's frustrating, and stupid. If you have resources you can spare, even if it puts a small burden on your people, why should it cause such outrage? Everyone deserves a shelter. Water. Food.

I'm glad you had the chance to just be Noctis the Nobody for a little while.

Unfortunately my world is one where being a woman is not very... safe. I would rather be seen as the Warrior of Light than as some trinket men seek to warm their beds. Of course there will always be those who see me as a prize to be won, so to speak. 🙄 🙄 🙄 I'm happy I was too busy to ever think of such things at the time.

Fortunately it has grown a little safer in Eorzea over the past years. And I'm rather adept at beating up men thrice my size. You just have to know exactly where to shove your knee lol. So it's more fun now when I'm just an unimportant commoner.

When I went to Ardbert's world it was wonderful. Everyone treated me so well, just like any other person.

I found out later they figured out I was the Warrior of Darkness, since I'm not very good at not having impossible things happen wherever I go. But they pretended they didn't know, so I was still treated just like everyone else. It was very nice. I love visiting the First. I get to experience normal person things.

Oh I got to meet a baby! A little baby girl, freshly born. Her parents asked if I would welcome her to the world, so I did. I don't have a suitable emoji. It was so wonderful. The first child of a generation that will never know life without the night sky. The sky Ardbert and I returned to them.

It was definitely worth it. All that pain and suffering is nothing next to the knowledge that that little girl and all those that follow will be able to dance under the stars. ✨

Sorry I've rambled again.

In truth, the concept is that simple. When two equal and opposite forces meet, they neutralize each other. If balance is restored it should, in theory, bring equilibrium.

When there is too much Light you turn into a Sin Eater. When there is too much Darkness you turn into a Voidsent — or a daemon, in the case of your world.

What I experienced was very similar to Ardyn's circumstances. I know this for a fact because of the Echo.

If not for Ardbert, I would have turned into something akin to Izunia in nature. Albeit more monstrous and with no memory of humanity.

I want to change his fate, and yours.

i'll think about it. no promises, i'm a little shared out this past month. but idk, i'll keep it in mind.

you're probably right about my dad. i don't have to like it, but it sounds legit. i guess it doesn't matter now since they're all dead anyway. them, dad, me and that fedora asshole... revenge is gonna kill off a lot of people before it's all over.

ig one good thing about the end of the world looming is that borders don't mean anything to the daemons- all humans are in danger so they all have to work together. last i heard even nifs were taking refuge in lucis & i hope they've been more welcoming than it used to go down in insomnia. it'd be nice if everyone stayed that way after the daemons are gone.

i told prompto i wanted us to end up together as a single nation. not so i could rule it all or anything, that's nif style. but maybe we could try living in peace for once. the world's been at war for like 300 years enuf is enuf

i get that kinda. obv not to the same extent bc im a guy but i had protection that other ppl didn't, thats a kind of luxury i only get from my position. if i wasn't the prince i would have died as a kid to the marilith, & like 4 yrs back some royal-hating drunk would have stabbed me if i didn't have gladio 2 protect me. there's perks even if it's hard sometimes

babies r cute as long as theyre not puking on u (´∀`)ｂ tho idk why ppl always seem 2 want them kissed by royalty, like did they think the magic rubbed off on them lol

i wonder if anything happens on eos if u absorb too much light, like what is the opposite of daemons

im supposed to absorb the whole crystal b4 i come out of it... it wouldn't be so bad if i turned into something boss (╯‵□′)╯¤=[]:::::> like with magic sword wings n shit

I understand.

On the First, ninety percent of the world was destroyed, and when the end was truly looming we brought that last 10% together. In a few days the whole of Norvrandt built a Talos (like a golem, or a robot made of rock and magic) so big it was taller than the mountains. So tall it reached the sky, just so I could go and kill the last Lightwarden residing there.

The people put aside all of their differences and banded together. The whole of the world put their hopes unto me, then did the impossible so I could bring the night back.

I succeeded in killing that monster, and brought the night back. I think it returned for less than a minute, because then I nearly died lol

But it was nice seeing all the people join together. I wish it could be like that on the Source. Just let everyone live their lives. Spread harvests and resources equally. Let everyone be cared for.

The Old World was a bit like that, actually. Before the Sound came and ruined it all.

I hope your world comes together. If I hadn't seen it for myself I don't know if I'd believe it possible. But it is.

I think if you weren't the prince you wouldn't have been attacked by the marilith at all, or a drunkard. But also that shouldn't matter anyway, because who in the hells attacks a godsdamned child? 😠💢

I haven't really seen any babies before. Just the newborn little girl. She was very ugly. Red and squashed and only just cleaned of the viscera of birth. But she was still so beautiful even if she looked like a big, ruddy potato. I'm glad they didn't ask me to hold her, because I wouldn't want to break her. She was so tiny. I bet if she puked it'd be a tiny puke, too. Gross, but tiny.

Sword wings leave many openings, so while they look cool they aren't very practical. I'm sure you'll still have shit though 💩

If you're absorbing the whole crystal and also have control of its power, in theory you should be able to manipulate your form.

Maybe the reason you had more of his face was because your form broke under the strain and the crystal or Bahamut couldn't remember what you looked like? That they could have decided 'close enough', because they're stupid and don't care.

If that were the case and you were given a new body, maybe you also have a 'final form'. Gods only know I've fought enough of them to expect some manner of form shift mid-fight. 🙄

Edited 2020-08-04 01:02 (UTC)

that sounds so cool. i kind of envy you for getting to see that... mustve been rly impressive to see every1 come together. im just gonna sleep through it i think & show up at the last minute to steal all the glory

maybe it'll make for a good story lol... every hero wants a good story right

daemons attack anybody prince or not, tho why it got inside the wall is a question nobody rly solved. was probably drautos, now that i think about it. he ended up being the cause of a lot of problems in retrospect. and like all our troubles stem from ppl hating our family. shit thats depressing

ive held a couple of babies. used 2 work at some outer-city refugee centers during hs. not newborn thats way too fragile for my twitchy swordhands, but like pre-toddler. galahd babies r the cutest, teenie tiny braids & huge brown eyes. i played keepaway 4 like 20 mins with this one kid putting a toy in and out of the armiger. never heard some1 giggle so much in my life

kids r good for the soul lol, like animals but more work

why does bahamut get 2 pull off sword wings and live like a million yrs no problem?? gods are stupid, if our powers come from him & the crystal we should ttly get sword wings too. im gonna ask ardyn, it'll be badass wait til u see

man now IM gonna puke @ that theory of bahamut mushing on my face like putty no thx. like u might be right but also i hate it!! if theyre gonna make me do all this sacrificial chosen bs they could at least remember my face not just somnus

its funny tho, i played a ton of video games where bosses had different forms but i don't think it ever happened irl? i kind of wish it did at least one time. games always made it look so cool when u win in the end

on the other hand if like deathclaws sprouted asswings and an old lucian chorus started playing out of nowhere i mightve quit this chosen thing on the spot, no thx

It

There are no words for it, really. To see that all my suffering had meaning, and that I wasn't squandering my life away on people unwilling to create a better world for themselves.

I hope you've beautiful dreams in your sleep, Noct. The most wonderful dreams.

You won't be stealing all the glory.

And there will certainly be stories. There will always be stories. Ones of heroes and their deeds and their sacrifices. Stories that inspire, and bring hope. That can shape both the future and the past.

Just do your best to survive so you can make sure your friends don't downplay their role in the story, hm?

Hatred is depressing.

Babies aren't though. Do you have more stories of them? Aside from the newborn babe the youngest child I ever met was perhaps six or seven summers.

Galahd babies sound very adorable! And that is such a clever use of the armiger. (♡°▽°♡) What are baby giggles like?

Miqo'te children have little tails, but their ears are big and cute. Auri children are the most adorable I've seen though — our horns and tails start out so small and stubby, but grow as we age. Σ>―(〃°ω°〃)♡→

If the gods here are kind, and if my world can do without me for a time, I think I would like one of my own. It is the most impossible of impossible dreams, but I'm allowed to have dreams. To use my body to bring life to the world instead of take from it. It would be nice. Terrifying, but so very nice all the same.

I pity those with immortality. How lonely must it get, without friends or family? It doesn't excuse him being an asshole though. I'm glad most of the immortals I know are relatively kind. You need to watch yourselves around the fae, but they're still quite kind in their own way. 🧚‍♀️

Do you remember when I explained teleportation in my worlds? Our bodies turn to aether and travel that way, with crystals as the start and end-points. I meant something more akin to that — you were turned into energy without form, and then couldn't reconfigure yourself afterward, so Bahamut took over. It sucks regardless, but I am imagining him realizing you needed a physical form again and thinking 'oh shite', like a child caught sneaking a cookie lol

Like this emoji 😱😱😱

It isn't incredibly common, yet frequent enough that it is a nuisance. With Primals it is most oft a temporary thing for the duration of their most powerful attacks. Susano, for example, spent much of our fight as perhaps five times my height. Then when he readied his strongest ability he grew until I would have been barely as tall as his first knuckle.

His sword grew accordingly as well, matching his height. I had to block it with my own sword in a battle of strength. It was very fun, honestly. The most enjoyable fight with a Primal I've ever had. Susano was... I believe the modern term is 'a real bro'? He just wanted a good fight, and he had as much fun as I did with it.

What is a deathclaw? They sound awful. I would like to fight one.

Edited 2020-08-04 18:12 (UTC)

i hope ur right. good dreams r kinda rare these days

weird related q tho: do u ever have dreams based on echos?

more baby stories lets see... one time i went & there was a little girl born too early so they didn't have a spare bed for her & every1 had spent all week taking turns carrying her in a lil tummy sling. when i showed up for my shift they didn't even ask they just strapped her on and told me when 2 check on her or feed her & i did the rest of my work with her sleeping & gurgling all day. it was sooo warm like wearing a mini-furnace around. they had to wrestle her away from me when i had to leave (;﹏;)

during 1 of the seasonal festivals they wanted to do an art project (i forget why) so i brought some paints, & one baby wanted 2 paint my hair instead. every1 thought it was funny until i left too late to go home & shower so i ended up in a council meeting with pink n blue streaks. didn't even acknowledge it when i went in i just acted normal to see if any1 asked lol. i thought dad was gonna explode trying to hold that kingly composure the whole meeting & every1 else was pissed at the ~indignity~ after it was done i could hear dad & clarus laughing 3 halls over, it was great

oh and the lady who ran the refugee center had a 4 yr old who she brought in a lot bc he fit right in w/ the other kids. he thought he owned the place 2 so imagine a tiny kid with hands on his hips and this adorable tenebraean accent all "ur highness u mustn't interrupt playtime, we do not nap until after noon"

i bet u would like a baby, w/ how you dote on hythlo and all. wouldn't mind seeing a baby auri too

lmaoooo ok ok ok maybe bahamut wears a mask to hide when he has lil freakouts when his stupid plan doesn't go the way he wants it to. ...wait shit do u think he can smite me from here, i still have a covenant and all

bahamut dont read this

deathclaws are the worst!!! like giant crab dragons w/ death lasers. ill see if i can find a picture. prompto wasnt with us when we fought one so i cant count on his selfies

I don't believe so. If I have, they aren't dreams I remember.

I have nightmares sometimes though.

I try not to sleep very much at home. Here, there is little else to do. How do civilians stand such mundane lives?

Oh my gods Noct that is so precious 😍 I did the same for Hythlodaeus when he was an egg, and until he grew too big. It was very nice, especially because it was cold out. He kept me so warm. Hades knew better than to try taking Hythlo away. I get cold so easy and my little egg is so snuggly.

Most of your council sound like they've got sticks so far up their arses they could brush their teeth with them. I imagine there are few greater honours than a baby deciding you're they're favourite.

I just imagined Alisaie as a very small child doing this, because it is something she would have done. "Don't you have better things to do than interrupt playtime, your highness?"

She would probably say the same thing even now, if I'm honest. Sometimes I feel bad for poor Alphinaud, but he was also so insufferable when he was younger lol They kept each other in line.

The thought of being a mother is something that always scared me. To be the world to something so precious and vulnerable and wholly dependent on me, when the whole of the world depends upon me as well. As things are, even if I could have a child, it would be too dangerous.

I have some pictures from when I was turned small. I was six years old, so not quite a baby. I have pictures from when I was twelve as well. I was such a rude adolescent it's embarrassing. Verstael approached me asking for a sample and Kiyomi told him he was being creepy.

"Do you ask all the little girls here that?"

Ardbert has the whole audio saved, since Kiyomi called him from her pocket in case something happened.

Bahamut cannot smite you from here, don't worry.

Shite Noct those sound amazing. Better than the boring zombie dhalmels.

[...nightmares... he'd best not bring it up, then. She has enough on her plate.]

i dont mind the idea of sleeping all day. id totally sleep all morning if i thought cor would let me get away w/ it

ya i dont rly miss the council... i used 2 wonder what id do about them when i became king, like can i fire them?? i would want a council that cared about lucis not just insomnia, some of them didnt even want 2 let the refugees in. like come on we're all lucians quit bein a snob just bc ur rich. dad let them get away w/ stuff bc they were old families but he didnt like it either

i kinda know what u mean. i didnt think much about kids until the treaty came up & suddenly i was gonna get married. every1 was like ohhhh hows it feel?? but it was hard enuf to wrap my head around bein a husband nevermind starting a family. i kinda knew in the back of my mind that it had 2 happen tho, in a line like ours... we burn out fast u can't just sit around & take ur time with it. dad wasnt even 30 when i was born and they still had ppl griping in the papers that he didnt have an heir yet

i didnt want 2 have a kid & then die early on them either. theres no good answer ig

omg besithia srsly did that?? what is that guys problem, cant he b normal for even 5 mins. good that u told him off. hes so weird ugh.

here its a bad photo but we were kinda in the middle of fighting it

[Attached is a somewhat blurry obscured image of a deathclaw on a snowy landscape, swords swung in the background.]

Sleeping all morning is all right every now and then, but not every day. Perhaps once or twice a week? I have lost muscle tone from periods of too much idleness, though feel healthier in most other ways due to my body having an opportunity to rest.

Perhaps have the people of each region under Lucian rule vote for one of their own they'd like to sit on the council. Something like a parliament.

Ishgard has shifted into bicameral republic, with two parliaments — the House of Lords and the House of Commons. It is meant to ensure that both the highborns and the lowborns are represented equally within the government.

What is the point in being a king if you can't kick out the council and replace it with those who hold the best interests of all in mind, rather than the few?

Unless you're the Fae King, I suppose. The fae don't fuss over trivial matters like politics. I should ask Titania one day what they do... I honestly have no idea.

I can scarcely wrap my head around my impending matrimony, and it was my own choice. I wonder if it's like that, regardless? To suddenly be thinking of yourself as someone's spouse.

I am fortunate that Ardbert has no expectation of children. I had been so worried, because he would be such a wonderful father. But he was confused when I asked if he would resent me for it, because he had already known I wasn't able to lol

I wonder what would have happened if someone in your family line decided to not produce any offspring, or was incapable of it?

Dying and leaving a child without a parent is part of why I would never have one as things are. I don't expect to see past thirty summers, if I'm honest. I know I have people who would take care of any child I had, but I've seen too many children learn they've lost their mother or father.

Are you surprised? Kiyomi kept reminding him that she was twelve. She wasn't an aetherologist. It was embarrassing to listen to, but also interesting. Even if she didn't have the resources to learn, her theories on aetherology weren't wholly incorrect. She was quite smart.

I do feel somewhat bad for Verstael. If he's always struggled with socializing it's little wonder he grew into the man he is now.

Swivving hells Noct that looks like so much fun I want to fight one. Do they have tails?

I will send some pictures of Kiyo. One moment.

[ She finds some pictures Ardbert took of her at six years old, having been convinced to take off her headscarf indoors at the very least.

The little girl is painfully small, pale, and her stubby horns are jagged at the ends in a clearly unnatural way — the shape doesn't at all resemble the broad wings of Era's adult horns.

Still, Kiyo looks content and safe in each photo, and the images do well in showing how tiny Auri horns and tails are when they're children. ]

Horns and tails grow as we age, though stop at a certain size. Our horns can regrow, and I believe our tails can as well if given time and proper treatment.

i like sleeping in & staying up late, but every1 i know are morning ppl. it wasnt as big a problem in insomnia but outside the walls we had to camp or stay in at night bc of daemons so wakeup was 6am every morning bright and early. awful uuuugh no thank u

ill leave government rebuilding to ignis & gladio & whoever else wants it. lucis doesnt need any more kings after me, it'll be better off if the ppl can decide for themselves. i think if thats the legacy i leave behind id be ok w/ that somehow

u should probably ask some1 who actually managed to get married bc idk that one, sorry.

ummm idk actually, about ppl who had reasons 4 not having kids. like obv they managed bc we made it all the way to me eventually, but the line def had some hiccups. queen crepera got the throne bc her dad and bro died from daemons, but a lot of generations only had 1 kid i think? maybe 2 avoid fights over succession considering how the line started. but if she wasnt born then the line would have ended with her bro. so maybe it was just luck sometimes

oh i bet u would like her, she was badass

yea idk how to feel about besithia, like on 1 hand he's kind of? trying? w/ prompto? but on the other hand he's creepy and a nif, and i dont think i can ever NOT hate nifs for what theyve done... its complicated ig.

oh yeah deathclaws have huge tails, big as tree trunks. they hit like a truck too, literally broke all my ribs one time

how come u and kiyomi are like different ppl? its not just u as a kid?

shes super cute tho holy shit, little stubbies. ur right auri babies are great

Some people have different natural sleep patterns to others. You might consider trying a schedule that more closely aligns to your biology, but still allows for productive daytime hours.

Perhaps wake up at 10am, and continue your training and other work later to account for the difference. You may find yourself with more energy, and feel more alert. It would be a matter of trial and error; experimentation, to see what best works for you. I tend to stay up late and rise early, but take naps in the during the hottest parts of the day.

That would be a good legacy to leave behind. Even if you do survive, you can pretend that you didn't and go off to be an adventurer or chocobo rancher or whatever your heart desires instead. Leave the politics to people more fond of them.

Queen Crepera? She must have been interesting. All of the women leaders I've met have been forces to reckon with.

You were taught about your family's lineage?

I don't know Verstael's relationship to Prompto or yourself, or the rest of your family, so I cannot judge on that. I do find him... sad, I suppose. It must be a lonely life.

When I was younger I thought I hated all Garleans. It wasn't until later I understood that I hated what Garlemald stood for and not the people themselves. The ones that weren't subjugated and oppressed, forced into servitude of the empire, were almost always soldiers who were manipulated into believing lies.

Some of my greatest allies have been Garleans.

All men are capable of horrible, unspeakable cruelties. In the end it doesn't matter their race or creed. We are all equals. Equally capable of good, or evil.

So I would say... Do not hate Nifs just for being of Nifleheim. If you need to hate, hate individuals. Or hate the society that twisted humanity into its cruelest forms.

In the end, however, hatred is a waste. There is so much of it in the world. Imagine how much hatred shaped the lives of your enemies. What would they have been if circumstances were different?

I do my best to feel sadness and love for each enemy I slay. Even if they may have done loathsome things... No one deserves to feel hated in their final moments.

But that is just my experience.

Do they do the thing where they spin in a circle and use the momentum to knock everyone away, or is it just a tail smash? Also ouch, Noct. That always hurts. Were your lungs all right? Punctured lungs are the godsdamned worst. As if a broken rib isn't irritating enough, suddenly you can't breathe either. 🙄

You are twenty, or something thereabouts, aren't you?

I've no memory from before the age of twenty-one. Not a single thing. Until I was turned into a child I had assumed Hydaelyn made me, or breathed life back into a corpse and stuffed me into it.

I was Her Crystal Bearer, and her daughter. I chose to be Era.

I do not remember being Kiyo, or Kiyomi, or Aura. The memories I have now are akin to the faded memory of a dream. The memories of your childhood are clearer than my own will ever be.

Auri children are so very cute. If I have a child one day she will look entirely Auri, save for having fewer scales.

ive tried a few different things but ppl never let me get away with it. theres always something thats gotta get done, meetings or training or lessons w/e. getting up sucks but its easier than getting chewed out for being lazy

man i would love that tho... just do whatever i wanted with my life. thats the dream, never had that before
like in school we had those days where the teacher's all "what do u want to be when u grow up". how am i supposed to answer that lol

queen crepera was a badass. i think she was the first queen? so it was a big deal and ppl were such assholes about it she flipped them all off and did everything from the shadows like a ninja. they called her the rogue & her legends are terrifyingly cool

i learned a little bit about as many kings as we still have records for. the whole line is a legacy y'know? & we gather power through the souls of ancestors. its important 2 know that history

ya it can do a tail spin if i remember it right. lungs... ummm i coughed up some blood so probably! iggy had an elixir so it was fine

i dont mean i hate ALL nifs. im not a kid i understand like, nuance and shit. but we dont rly get to meet avg citizens so i have no idea what theyre like for the most part. its said that the emperor is loved by his ppl but that same emperor has been killing OUR ppl for decades so it doesn't paint a good picture. plus the commanders weve fought are like, cartoonishly evil, i half expected a solid "mwahaha" out of them. i hate those guys. they just want 2 hurt ppl

aranea and her guys are cool tho, and they're from niflheim. & she had the sense to get herself out when she saw how bad things were getting. not every1 had that chance, & a lot of ppl probably died when the daemons took over gralea. i can kind of get that some1 like besithia who is rly loyal to the emperor might balk at the idea of either of them being evil and destroying their own country

i cant be as nice as you tho. you dont remember your early years and that sucks, im sorry. but i remember mine. 20 yrs of war & ppl coming into the city with nothing bc niflheim took everything from them & killed everyone they love. they attacked tenebrae & killed the oracle just 2 kill me and my dad. their daemon almost cripped me. they infected kids w/ starscourge & kept making monsters even after they owned the world. i don't know how 2 not be angry about it. im not sad when they die trying to kill me

[...that sounds really dour though, so-]

in their defense they make cute babies too

It isn't laziness to work with your body rather than against it, but that is understandable. If you ever wish to take a nap one afternoon, you're welcome to come over. I can also teach you to use a proper bow, if you like. I believe I made the same offer to Prompto, but didn't have the supplies at the time.

Likewise, if you would like or need any training with a greataxe, Ardbert would be thrilled to assist.

What would you do? If you had a chance to just be Noctis — a future — what would you enjoy most? It is worth thinking about, even if it may never happen.

She sounds wonderful. What were her weapons of choice? I know some shinobi, and they are formidable allies. The art of the shinobi in my world originated with my people, the Raen.

You've elixirs that can cure shattered ribs? That's incredible Noct (°ロ°) !

My apologies — I hadn't meant to imply it was childish. You would be surprised at how many grown men and women who paint all Garleans with the same broad stroke. So much hatred.

I've met a few Garleans like your Aranea. The lucky few who saw where things were headed and found a way to leave. I'm glad she and her companions escaped Nifleheim. It means there must be others like her. Hopefully they all find their way to refuge.

Gaius van Baelsar was once a Garlean general. He was tasked with conquering Eorzea. He failed, and once he saw that the empire was willing to destroy Eorzea he began to have doubts. He truly, honestly believed that conquering us 'savages' would bring us peace and enlightenment, or some gobshite like that. He was actually the one who told me I had the power to rule. He had a big, long speech trying to convince me to join his cause.

He was manipulated and lied to, and as a result he was a ruthless man. I felt no remorse when I believed him dead by my actions.

Then he reappeared one day, returning a comatose Alphinaud to us. He saved my little brother. He saved my baby brother and brought him back to us when we feared him dead.

Hard as it may be to understand, people who are loyal to their leaders trust them. They trust that even seemingly horrific acts are done with foresight and a purpose for the greater good of their people. Or they are simply told lies about what is being done, where Nifleheim or Garlemald may have instigated an attack resulting in the deaths of their own, they can say that it was the Lucians or the Eorzeans who did it.

Their people cling to their trust as the world crumbles around them, because otherwise they would crumble too.

Do you mind if I tell you a story? It is one of a war between dragons and 'elves'. It was what gave me understanding, where before I felt only unending anger.

[ And speaking of anger, she can't help but feel a spark of resentment at how easily he dismisses her. She takes a moment to push it aside because she knows it's because he does not and will not ever be able to understand it, and she would never wish for him to. ]

I will never be able to comprehend living so many years, so I will never truly be able to understand. I'm so incredibly sorry for all that you have suffered through, and will continue to suffer through. If I've been dismissive of you it was never my intent.

But please

Noct
it's

However easily I may share it with you, not a single soul in my home worlds know the true extent of my amnesia. They will never know of the detailed journals I keep. They will never know that each time I fall asleep there is a moment where I fear this may be the last thing I ever remember. That I will wake up in the morn an empty slate once again, forgetting all the things I hold so dear.

Ardbert knows, and Hades knew. I've hinted at it before with Ardyn, but never told him.

I have near five years of memories from home. A majority of my memories are horrible. I see the worst of humanity more often than I see the good. Over half of my life has been spent in active war. I've lost so many friends I cannot count them any longer.

After Haurchefant was killed I spent so much time being angry. I was so filled with hatred. I wanted to lash out. To hurt all those around me. I was tired of losing everything I held dear to me.

I slaughtered the man who killed my brother. He died by a blade fueled by anger, resentment, and hatred.

It only served to make me feel worse. I did not kill Ser Zephirin — I murdered him, Noct. I could argue it was self-defense, but in my heart of hearts I know that is a lie.

Since that day I've made sure to wield my weapons out of a desire to protect, not a desire for vengeance. It isn't a matter of being nice. It is a matter of never wanting to feel like that again. I never want to become like those I kill.

And so I make sure to always feel compassion for those whose lives I must take. Not just for them, but for myself.

You are such a kind person, Noct. I don't want you to ever feel like I did back then.

pfft if it isnt laziness someone tell gladio that. its fine here tho, i can nap all i want after i make it through training. its not so bad

im pretty good w/ axe polearms, if i ever get one here tho i can get practice in with him. shooting a real bow might be cool too

if i had a choice... gods idk. i like drawing. i had a blast doing all the designing and dev work for kings knight here. i liked doing the volunteer work back home, with animals & kids. i was just happy helping ppl i think? sounds kind of lame but i liked being a hunter. or adventurer ig by ur worlds standard. but thinking about "what if" is depressing as hell.

her weapon's this gigantic shuriken, 4 points, each side's as long as my arm. works like normal shurikens with the armiger tho bc i can just call it back and keep tossing it. its pretty good

theres some rly good elixirs that heal almost any damage, but theyre sourced from rly rare ingredients so we had 2 be careful. it was mostly just me & gladio fighting that day so to be a man down was real bad, made it worth using it

some things can be excused by bad leadership, i know that. aranea was lied to plenty as well. but theres some stuff that theres no excuse for. its hard to draw the line between, i just know i cant be so forgiving of the ones who cross it. im not sorry for that

u can tell a story, ill listen.

[He does take a moment's pause before he continues, because... yeah, that was a lot.]

im sorry. i didnt mean to make light of it. get p self centered when I'm pissed off & the nifs piss me off like almost nothing else except maybe that asshole. doesnt make it ok tho

i hope you get your memories back. i cant imagine how scary that would be, id be freaked out too if that happened to me. i understand a little- obv not like that but after marilith i lost a lot of myself. iggy used to tell me how different i was but i dont remember it at all. i knew ppl and where home was and i recognized my own stuff but its like my brain couldnt remember who i was, like all that happened & suddenly i woke up in tenebrae a whole new person. i dont like to hear that i was someone else b4, like marilith took that from me too. but whoever i was back then isnt who i am now and i like who i am mostly.

i like who u are now too, i hope you keep the memories u earned by everything u went through from now on whatever else happens

i did feel that hate for izunia. idk if i still do but he

[.....]

after altissia it felt like he took everything from me. i wanted so badly to find him again and make him feel what i felt somehow. when he showed up i didnt even think about what he was saying to me, i just saw his face and wanted to carve it off his body

it wasnt him though. his magic can make other ppl look and sound different, and he changed prompto to himself & neither of us knew it. i almost killed him

i dont want to hate so much that it blinds me into hurting my friends. next time i saw him i listened & waited until i knew it was him, & from now on ill do the same again. i dont know if i can feel compassion for some1 like him, even now that i know his whole story, not after what he did. but when i kill him itll be for the world, not revenge. i think i can manage at least that much

If he ever arrives here I can supply you with scientific evidence about differing circadian rhythms.

I can teach you how to make one. We would need the materials, and purchase time at the forge, but a simple polearm is hardly a challenge. I may actually have the metal on hand for the axe head, since I've been trying to gather enough for a greatsword. I haven't been able to acquire enough scraps of consistent quality to forge a blade the size I need. It is frustrating.

Would you like to design something for my wedding?

Oh, that sounds very useful. Shinobi have a spell where they create a shuriken out of aether, but it is not something they can do in rapid succession. How do you manage to throw it effectively without cutting yourself? I'm unfamiliar with the movement needed to throw one.

I will tell you of the Dragonsong War another day. The thousand year war between Ishgard and the Dravanians. Perhaps I will share it with the network. Enough people seem enthralled by the fantastical aspects of my reality that they may enjoy it.

It's all right, Noct. I know you didn't. I'm just sensitive with regards to memory. I think it may be why the Echo strikes me as it does — there is so much empty space to be filled. Like a sponge.

What you describe is a common side-effect of experiences such as yours. Your brain was protecting itself as best it could. Who you were after and who you are now is a testament to your will. I like this person you are now.

I'm so sorry. I have never been placed in a situation like that... I can only imagine how awful it was. I'm glad Prompto survived, and you chose to learn from such a horrible experience.

Have compassion for the person he was, but not the one he became. Kill him for the world, and for your family. Put an end to it.

lol ok i would actually like to see that, put a pin in it

ive never done forging before. probably better left in more expert hands lol... might be neat to see it done. do u know about making other stuff? like not weapons

uhhhh i mean i could try and design a thing but im not a pro or anything... its just something i do in my free time. what r u thinking?

the royal arms work with w/ the armiger a different way than our normal weapons, so part of it is skill and the other part is just kinda levitation ig. it can fly at weird angles and duplicate itself, its super not a normal shuriken so idk how to explain how it works lol
if it ever shows up ill let u see a demo. sry i cant just hand it over tho

ya i get that. probably why the memories stick so well, with less other memories to push them out. itd be good if there was a way to, idk, separate that tho. not the echo but the way the memory thing works. u should get to keep your own memories & not fill your head with other ppls. thats not great for every1 involved i think. not that im mad about it, not ur fault, its just kinda... idk. invasive? like its stuff that has a lot of meaning so the impacts rly bad on both sides
ugh ugh idk how to say what i mean, am i making any sense??

i guess i dont have much of a choice about how it gets done. with izunia i mean. like apparently ill have ten years to sit around thinking about it so maybe when i wake up ill feel a lil more charitible about it. hard to say b4 it happens u know?

Most of what I learned was out of necessity — so accessories, foci, weaponry, and armor. I know how to make basic potions, healing remedies, and enchanted inks for my arcanima. I've made a few clockwork automatons, though I wouldn't call myself an expert. They require time I often didn't have to spare.

I used to make toys for children at the orphanages. Little things, like wooden boats or swords. My favourite was making plush toys they could hold close at night; soft and warm, with a core of fragrant herbs to soothe them.

I also made toys for Dravanian children sometimes, when I visit my dragon friends. The dragonets were especially curious about airships one day, bothering a poor knight who just wanted to deliver supplies. He couldn't understand them, so I translated and he thought it was quite cute. Children were children, even if they were dragons. He let me have some scrap to make the trio each a toy airship of their own and they flew off with them immediately, tossing them into the air and letting them fall deep into the Sea of Clouds before chasing them.

I could use something to decorate my horns, but doesn't cover them. The 'aesthetic' will be the night sky, filled with sparkling stars.

And if it wouldn't cause offense, I would like to incorporate something Lucian into the decorations somehow. Your family is important to me. It would feel wrong not to acknowledge that in some way.

So far I've only truly seen simple blades used as a target for teleporting, and even that was very impressive to me. To hear that you can do all of these other things as well is very, very cool and makes me a little bit jealous! I love hitting targets with projectiles, but being limited by my ammunition is frustrating lol It's part of why I favour magic.

Yes, I spoke to Ardbert of it before. At home I never felt guilty because it always provided information that would help me, and was obvious it would help me in some way. The Echo was also common enough that a majority of people have an awareness of it.

Here, it has felt... Very invasive. It feels wrong, like it's something dirty. I don't know how to control it, but I know it can be controlled. I have been working on keeping my soul from reaching out to others since that's the only thing I can think of that could help prevent visions, but it is painful. Hemera loves so deeply. When someone around me is sad she wants to reach out and comfort them. To fight against the nature of your soul is a difficult thing, but I'm not sure what else to do. I will keep trying to figure something out.

While I'm sure there is a lot I could say about that, I suddenly find my mind filled with colourfully uncharitable thoughts so numerous I can't decide on any in particular.

i ask bc elemental magic is rly difficult for me, but when we have flasks to carry it i can do some spellcrafting ahead of time & its pretty useful, and safer for every1. but i dont rly have flasks here so my magics too wild to rly be any good. if we could figure out how 2 make magic flasks that would be a+

omg... do u have pictures of baby dragons bc holy shit that sounds cute too. ive never seen a baby dragon just like full-sized underground dragon monsters lol

ok. if u can send me a couple pics of u, like from side and front where the horns r visible and center i can try some stuff. stars... so sparkly ig? maybe silver. yeah i think that would b ok

i cant speak for all of us but i dont think any1 would find it offensive. if u want lucian u could try skulls wings or chrysanthemums
...ya not very wedding-friendly lol

i think u would like the shield of the just. its uses life to power itself for offense but uses magic to heal on defense. using it is kind of a cool balancing act between the two. that 1 i can show u if u want, i have it here. wait and have u never seen the armiger fully activated? its pretty awesome. it looks waaaay better with all the royal arms but i can do the baby version rn

i cant see one of us getting mad @ u for the echo memories, so at least ur safe with it, but idk. be careful i guess. some1 who doesn't know u could freak out and try 2 hurt u for something like that, & i know u can kick ass but echos kinda leave u vulnerable too right? so yeah maybe dont tell ppl if it happens unless u know theyll b cool about it. at least until ur back on ur feet after.

huh?

oh

shit

hey can u do me a favour and just forget i said that thing cool ok thx

Are the flasks themselves enchanted in some way, or do they simply need to be made of a specific material? In theory it shouldn't be difficult.

I made a figurine of Midgardsormr as a dragonet. I will fetch it for pictures. One moment.

[ She takes a few pictures of the clay figurine she sculpted of the Father of Dragons (in his baby form), painted with careful accuracy and given glass eyes that look quite realistic.

She then also sends along a picture of her horns from the front and side, camera held out at a distance with one hand while the other pulls her hair away from the horn she's focusing on. Then she sends along another picture of her horns from behind (clearly taken for her by Ardbert, as there are limits to even her flexibility), hair pulled up and away from her horns to better show the way they flare outward. ]

I was thinking of making small crystals from glass to create a sparkling effect. I'll likely be doing that regardless, then sewing them into my skirt along with aetherially conductive thread.

Chrysanthemums are lovely. I have some in my garden. They symbolize 'honesty', and would go well with thistles. Ishgardian flowers and Lucian flowers. I will come up with something, thank you.

I'm not sure I understand. By 'life' are you referring to one's vigour?

If I am entirely honest I don't actually know much about the armiger. I know:
» you can teleport using it
» you can put things in it like my inventory
» you can share it with people
» it has very cool weapons ?
» it is an inheritance

What do you mean by 'fully activated'?

I have never been attacked whilst having a vision. It is something I've never considered before. Do you think anyone here would hurt me? Should I let them, if they do? It may make them feel better. The Echo takes control away from them, and harming me may give them back that sense of control.

I do have a strong history of forgetting things.

I'll be sure not to bring it up, Noct.

ill ask dad or cor about materials but the enchantment comes from us not the flasks so no worries about that part.

o rite thats a dragon in ur world. lol i had a moment of ??? bc i expected giant snake. thats rly cute tho. i wish eos had baby dragons, we have wyverns & some other similar monsters but its not the same...

ok i can work w/ that. no promises on how good itll look but ill try to do something that fits

honesty huh... thats a little different. is that for a specific colour? in lucis we have 2 that i know. white for truth til death (so thats ur honesty, but the death part is a rly big deal), thats the national flower. gold is for the lucis caelum line, its used 4 royal stuff, like the crests
that is p much the extent of my knowledge about flower symbology. oh bsides sylleblossoms but theyre not lucian

i guess vigors a way to put it. energy, health, w/e. using the crystals magic takes a lot & if u don't balance it properly it can kill u. so let magic regenerate b4 u run out, dont push too many limits, chug those ethers, thats how it normally goes for us. royal arms r like that but with life not magic. theres a learning curve, had 2 figure out how fast each one took me out & how fast my body healed after. like omg the first time i warped w/ the shield i hit a whole pack of voretooths and almost died on the spot, i thought iggy was gonna have a heart attack lol. the arms are awesome but great power @ a great price if u get me

thats pretty much spot on w/ the armiger yeah. by fully activated i mean like if we channel power in a pinch we can call all the weapons in the armory out at once and send them out 2 attack alongside us or act as shields, stuff like that. prompto got a bunch of photos h/o

[After a minute of digging around he sends a couple of photos.]

dad & i think ardyn can use w/e weapons they have but mine usually only works w/ the royal arms

"should i let them" what the hell kind of question is that r u 4 real?? gods you probably are. the answer is OF COURSE NOT if some1 tries to hurt u, u punch them in the teeth

omg omfg i didnt mean THAT sorry bad phrasing

Depending on what the enchantment is, it may be possible to enhance the efficacy of them if I were to carve geometries into flasks crafted of aetherically conductive metals.

Midgardsormr is not just a dragon, he is the Father of Dragons, king of kings, and guardian deity of Silvertear Falls.

His planet, the Dragonstar, was laid to waste by a weapon sent by yet another unknown world in our universe. His seven children were yet unborn, and so he took his eggs and fled — he flew the void of space tirelessly until he came upon my planet. He had once been known for his brilliant, fiery mane, but his journey took so many years that the the fire burned out.

He deemed my star safe for his children, and in return for sheltering him, Hydaelyn formed a pact with Midgardsormr. He would be a protector of the realm, and She would safely harbour his children. Thus, the dragons came to be.

Near thirty years ago now, his physical body perished in a battle defending Silvertear Lake from an imperial invasion. 'The Battle of Silvertear Skies', where he led the Dravanian Horde in a fight against the Garlean empire. There was an airship — a dreadnaught — named the Agrius that led the aerial assault. It was large... Large enough to hold a town within it.

Midgardsormr was even larger. He coiled around the Agrius like a python, strangling it. When the ship finally exploded it ended up killing him. His corpse is still twined around the Agrius even in death, and serves as a reminder of both the reality of gods and the strength of the empire.

I eventually met him, of course. His body was ruined but his soul was intact. He roused from his slumber when I went to investigate his corpse, and was not best pleased. He tried very hard to kill me, then stripped me of Mother's Blessing, then took the form of a dragonet and formed a covenant with me, intent on observing my deeds and judging my worth.

Gods he was such an arsehole. Never would give answers when I wanted them, but always had something snarky and cryptic to say when I didn't. While traveling within my soul, or wherever it was he slotted himself, he was slowly regenerating his energy. He fell silent after the Dragonsong War, and remained that way until the enemy that destroyed his home came to Eorzea.

It was very difficult. It would have been impossible without his help. At one point I was trapped within a binding prism and facing certain death... There suddenly there Midgardsormr was, no longer a dragonet but the Father of Dragons, bursting through the rift and crushing my prison in his jaws. He had used up all of his regained energy in order to protect me, sending him shortly thereafter into hibernation.

For Midgardsormr, a short nap is the equivalent of a mortal's lifetime. I will likely never see him again.

Even in sleep, however, he still continued to watch out for me and my friends. When his enemy later trapped us in the void of a collapsing rift, suddenly Hraesvelgr appeared. He bore Cid, Alpha, and I to safety after. His father had spoken to him from within dreams, telling him to come to my aid and the great wyrm obliged.

Hraesvelgr is one of the First Brood — one of the first seven dragons born upon my world.

Hraesvelgr, the White Wyrm.
Nidhogg, the Black Wyrm. (Deceased.)
Tiamat, the Dusk Wyrm.
Bahamut, the Dawn Wyrm. (Deceased.)
Ratatoskr, the Curious Wyrm. (Deceased.)

I know nothing of the remaining two, save for that they are still alive. I hope I am able to meet them one day.

My apologies — I am quite fond of the Dravanians. I find them much easier to understand than people, even when the elder dragons speak so cryptically.

White chrysanthemums are loyalty, devotion, and honesty. Violet blooms represent the unbearable pain of lost love. [ Take a wild guess at which she has more of in her garden. ] 'Truth til death' is a lovely meaning, though perhaps not quite fitting at a wedding where the groom has already died.

What do sylleblossoms mean?

Oh, I understand that. It is a precarious line to stay balanced upon in combat. As a Dark Knight I cloak my blade in stygian flames and empower myself with eldritch arts, all fueled by my aether. If I am not careful to balance my aether reserves and my vitality there is a risk of entropic backlash that I've heard can severely wound the soul.

It is incredibly fun. Especially when particularly obnoxious civilians are utterly horrified by my dark arts. I've had a few disrespectful men look like they shat their pants. 🤣

Noct, that looks super cool!!!!! Ardyn can do that too?????

In that situation I would deserve it. Besides, I can take a punch or two, or twenty. Also don't punch teeth, Noct — they can cut your flesh and cause awful infections. Aim for the nose, or the jaw instead. A proper punch can knock someone out cold.

Your phrasing was all right! I was just trying to make a joke. I should have used an emoji 😋

idk how our magic would mesh, we might have to experiment w/ it a bit. its power can be enhanced with more energy or consuming stuff & adding it to the spell, so maybe?

o shit since ur all aether beefed up i wonder what like 1 of ur scales would do to a spell flask. is that creepy?? is that like adding fingernails or something

[Now excuse him as he goes silent for a while because that sure was a long one she just sent.]

damn thats a story and a half. he sounds rly cool, & you did like a million things back home didn't u?? how did u find time to breathe, i thought i was busy lol

i think we'd all be more chill w/ bahamut if he was more hands on like that. or like shiva maybe, at least putting the effort in to talk to us

maybe midgardsormr (gods thats a mouthful) will show up here or something & u can see him again that way. thatd be cool

sylleblossoms mean sincerity, & "a heart that doesnt give up". makes sense for a flower that crossed continents and survived as many wars as it has for 2000 years

lmao damn THAT sounds fun too. im calling it now- 1 day, tag team, we make someone cry w/ murdermagic. itd be gr8

im pretty sure ardyn can do the full armiger yeah. ive never seen it but if me & dad can do it, he should be able to

u wouldn't deserve it sym. anyway its just a phrase not actual advice. gladio says punching the throat is good too

Aether is just energy, and arcanima directs and shapes that energy into what you need. If the energy of your enchantment comes in contact with the flask upon activation, a geometry should in theory have an effect. Alternatively I could stuff a portion of my aether in a geometry and see if that boosts the power.

My scales are something between bone and fingernail in structure. I don't find it creepy. Au Ra scales are very durable, and traditionally are used for reinforcing things. Personally I make daggers and jewelry from mine. I actually made a dagger for Somnus, and saw him teleport using it. It was cool.

If you can find out the materials and shape of the flasks, along with any other requirements, I can make a few fairly easily.

If you or Dad want to try using my scales for anything you are always welcome to ask. I have more than enough to share.

I didn't really have much time. My life has always been spent keeping busy. Someone always needs the Warrior of Light. There is always a war, or a Primal, or looming calamity. Spare moments were always spent training. I would feel guilty if ever I was idle.

'There is no rest for the righteous.'

I'm used to traveling between nations and continents and worlds on a whim. When I think of how trapped I am here it makes me feel like I'm dying. It is a very slow and unproductive death. I don't know what I would do without Ardbert. 💏 He is stronger than be, but I am more powerful. Our spars are satisfying.

Oh! Hraesvelgr was the original Shiva's lover. She was a normal mortal woman and they fell in love, but because mortal lifespans are so short she begged him to consume her so their souls would be forever entwined.

So he ate her. And her soul is still with him, guiding him.

That is a lovely meaning! I know there is no shortage of sylleblossoms here. It's nice to know the meaning they hold.

My murdermagic is aspected to Darkness, so it may make people uncomfortable. I also don't have a large enough sword yet, unfortunately. My Darkside has been very restless within me, having none of their usual outlets. I summon them sometimes just to talk. Maybe you can meet them someday. If I get a proper sword we can all team up as a trio. ⚔️⚔️⚔️

I also have some of the Dreadwyrm's aether remnants within me, and am able to summon a Demi-Bahamut to fight alongside me for short bursts. I've avoided summoning it because I didn't want to freak anyone out.

And he has never shown me??? 😠😠

The best place to punch is an uppercut to the gut, at the solar plexus. It knocks all the breath out of them if you do it right. But usually if I'm in a position where I need to punch someone I could also kick them in the balls, so I do that instead. It's super effective. 💯

bone & scale usually duplicates the spell when its cast, or adds special effects like stop or death i think? wait not death uhhh. curse? that sounds right. im rly out of practice, its been almost a year and we experimented a lot at camp so a lot of the time we didn't find out what it did until the next day. if i had iggys notes maybe id know 4 sure

if i can get flasks we can play around with it. something 2 do anyway

i would go crazy if downtime couldn't happen. idk even like an hour fishing in the morning while iggy's makin breakfast was enough 2 get me through the bad days, it didnt rly serve a purpose it just helped me relax. ppl arent machines we can't go 4ever. u should get new hobbies while u have time to explore it (๑˃ᴗ˂)ﻭ

ate her???? like not as a failytale but for real?? wtf that wild. i guess love rly does know no bounds.

shivas always been an astral afaik on eos but she pretended 2 b a messenger for luna. idk if it was just to guide her or also to hide, bc niflheim had killed her body a long time ago. shes so cool, i rly like shiva... she loves ifrit, but since that asshole made him a daemon she asked me to kill him so hed be free, they cant rly be together like they wanted either

kind of sad, shivas across the universe having kinda tragic love stories... i hope 1 somewhere is alive & happy, geez

is darkside like another person inside u?

[Not that long ago that would have been a much, much stranger question to ask. Weird how getting close to Pyra has skewed his view on such things.]

anyway i wouldnt mind seeing either, i dont think id freak out. at least if i knew it was coming, idk how my dumb trauma brain handles surprise darkness these days lol

i mean its ardyn he probably didnt even think about it, or hed be like ohhhh but my power is so terrible and evilllll i am darkness and sad do not compliment me i cannot possibly be cool (っ˘̩╭╮˘̩)っ

lmao remind me not 2 piss u off i like my balls as they are

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heck im glad i was lookin for something else bc this notif was poofed

let's see if this one is poofed!

it did not! /o/

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